Camp Pin Oak. Sally. I was 11, she had already turned 12. I was jealous. She read my diary. I hid her Kotex – she didn’t need it anyway. But her camp luggage consisted of a small overnight bag that had her clothes for two weeks – camp uniform, swimsuit, shorts, undies – and her large bag contained contraband food. We both had arrived “buddy-less” due to last-minute circumstances so we were forced to deal with it. For two weeks a love/hate relationship ensued and I left camp thinking I wouldn’t see her again. After all, she lived in Columbia – I was from Fulton. Facebook, email and cell phones were a LONG way from happening!
I was wrong!
Our mothers both insisted we write to each other and by time I turned 12 in November, she was invited to visit for a long weekend. Turns out we could tolerate each other and it was fun to have a friend in another town. By spring when we needed to register for Girl Scout camp again, we signed on as cabin buddies and the friendship of a lifetime was cast in stone!
In the course of a year, Sally shot up to 5’10″ tall while I hovered at 5’5″ – but I looked up to her in more ways than just her height. That summer we had a cabin with friends Barbara from Fulton and Jane (Jungle Jane) from Columbia and Sally invented the bright idea that we should volunteer to be PLOs – Permanent Latrine Orderlies! Since chore assignments were rotated by cabins and no one wanted to clean the latrines, we had no problem convincing the others to give us the job. Naturally Sally had figured out we could get our duties down to a science, complete them quickly and be lounging on our bunks with comic books with the others toiled with other responsibilities.
Our friendship grew.
High school found us writing daily epistles detailing every aspect of our lives (remember, we didn’t have email in those olden days!) and at least once a month, I was in Columbia for a weekend or she was in Fulton. Until she turned 16 and got her own car, we relied on good ole Greyhound to transport us!
For some reason we never really envisioned going to college together. Her brother was at Drury and I applied for a scholarship there but we just didn’t talk about it – until one night in the spring of our senior year of high school, we revealed our college choices to each other and both said “Drury.” We were headed to Springfield and a daily dose of each other.
Was Drury ready for us? Probably not – our first night at college we cut out of the required convocation, got goodies from the vending machine and sat in my darkened dorm room and basked in the glow of being away at college – and being together!
Our first year we didn’t room together but were positioned right across the hall from each other in the dorm. I roomed with Leslie who was 4’11″ – Sally by now was 6’2″ and with me at 5’7″ and always in the middle, we looked like stairsteps as we walked across campus together. We all pledged the same sorority and were inseparable.
Fast forwarding over the years, we stood up for each other in our weddings, were godmothers to each firstborn (me to Scott and Sally to Tammy), supported each other through divorces, stood by each other as we lost our parents and rejoiced as John and Burl entered our lives for middle-age romance – with us, not each other!
Sally moved to Michigan for a brief time and then settled in St. Louis where she still lives. I stayed in Springfield. We raised our kids (2 for me, 4 for her), did our time as stay-at-home moms, got advanced degrees, had careers and saw each other whenever possible.
Last month Sally left 30+ years as an elementary teacher to join me in Life 2.0. She has enriched the lives of so many kids through the years, guided new teachers, tutored those who were struggling and loved every minute of it. For Sally, teaching was not a job – it was a calling. I am absolutely amazed at her depth of talent and dedication and hate that a bunch of youngsters won’t get to be part of the “Bokal Bunch” at Bellerive School in the future.
We’ve always joked that if/when we get to hell, I will be forced to teach 3rd grade for eternity while she will have to do budgets and financial analysis. Good thing we knew our strengths and found people to pay us to do what we love.
Yesterday Sally’s kids had a retirement party for her at Chandler Hill Winery in Defiance, MO.
Tammy and I help Sally celebrate her retirement!
It wasn’t billed as a surprise party but apparently no one mentioned it to her so she thought she and John were joining son Brad and his girlfriend, Erin, for an afternoon of wine tasting along with daughter, Betsy. Son Scott claimed to be in Chicago at a golf tournament for the weekend!
It was so fun to see the look on her face when she walked in and saw us – and even more fun to give her a special gift to mark her outstanding career and a recent significant birthday. 
I knit the wrap with a collage yarn called AlpLite which I purchased at Yarn Worx in Nixa. It was a true labor of love as I’d never made anything for Sally and loved being able to create something for her. I can only hope she enjoys wearing it as much as I enjoyed making it for her.
We are both looking forward to getting more time together with our guys and with each other to enjoy life. We used to say we’d room together in “The Home” but hopefully with John and Burl around, we won’t be relegated to being alone in our old age.
So here’s to Sally who has had an outstanding career as an educator and is still pursuing her career as a top-notch mom, friend and mentor as well as being #1 in John’s life.
It’s a new stage of life, Sally – let’s go attack it just like we did Drury!
L-R Anna (Scott's girlfriend), Scott, me, Sally, Tammy, John, Betsey, Erin (Brad's girlfriend), Brad
What a wonderful story of the twists and turns of life and how friendships develop/evolve/endure. Hats off to both of you – what a treasure!
Ah, Pin Oak! You bring back some excellent memories for me with your reminiscences.
what a great story about you two and how amazing a friendship can be. we loved having you and please dont be a stranger
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